You might think that being nice at work means losing out to more aggressive colleagues. But research by Wharton Professor Adam Grant shows the opposite. Givers—people who do more for others than they expect in return—rise in organizations. However, not all generous people succeed the same way.
What’s in a gift?
Reciprocity
Psychologist Robert Cialdini lists reciprocity as one of seven effective influence tactics.
As an example, Cialdini discusses a case study at a British pharmaceutical company. To improve the return rates for a survey sent to physicians, half were sent a survey with a promise of £ 20 upon completion; the other half received a survey with a check for £ 20 already enclosed. 66 % of doctors receiving a promise of £ 20 completed the survey. For those who received a check, the rate of return was 78 %.
What about the 22 % of doctors who received a check but did not complete the survey? Simple. None of them cashed the check!
Accepting a gift creates psychological pressure to return the favor.
Grandma knows this well. That delicious home-baked apple pie she just offered you is a great way to get you to visit her more often!
How to Be a Smart Giver
There are three ways that people interact with others: taking, matching, and giving. Takers try to get as much as they can from others. Matchers try to balance what they give and get. Givers, according to Grant, are “the rare breed of people who contribute to others without expecting anything in return.”
Grant’s research shows that givers are sometimes taken advantage of by takers. In a society made up of hawks (who fight for what they want) and doves (who avoid conflict), the hawks soon take over. However, by setting boundaries, givers can thrive in competitive organizations. For example, givers could refuse to help notorious takers. They could set aside blocks of “do not disturb” time to ensure they meet their personal goals.
By helping others proactively, givers build a network of supporters who are willing to help them in the future. This network helps them reach higher positions and stay there.
Giving is not only good for individuals, but also for teams and organizations. A review of management literature by Nathan Podsakoff and colleagues found that giving leads to better business outcomes, such as higher profits, customer satisfaction, and productivity, as well as lower costs and employee turnover.
How to lead by giving: tips on how to be a generous leader
Give the gift of attention. No screens, no calls, no multitasking. Just being there for someone is probably the most valuable gift of all. Try listening to someone for five minutes without judging, interrupting, or advising. The other person will notice!
Practice the art of five-minute favors. How can you help someone in five minutes or less? Five-minute favors include introducing people who share a common interest, thanking someone in public for their contribution, sharing an article, or endorsing a colleague on a social network.
Give the gift of meaning. Many people struggle to see the direct impact of their work on others. Making the impact visible can lead to dramatic results. For example, employees at a call center raising funds for college scholarship generated 170 % more revenue after they spent only 10 minutes with a real scholarship recipient.
Ask others to help. Ask people to pay the favor forward to someone else, even if you don’t ask for a return favor yourself.
Set boundaries. Set aside blocks of time for giving, rather than trying to help everyone all the time. Concentrate your giving in areas that are dear to your heart. Decide when you need to be personally involved and when you can help by involving someone else.
Shape the culture. Your behavior as a leader has a strong impact on whether your team develops a giver, taker, or matcher culture. Team incentives promote a culture of sharing. Reward leaders based on the positive impact they have on other teams and departments. For example, by tracking how many people under a leader have had a lateral promotion.
Adam Grant on giving and success
You can take giving too far (humor)
References
Cialdini, R. (2021). Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (New and Expanded). New York: Harper Business.
Dominus, S. Is Giving the Secret to Getting Ahead? The New York Times, 27 March 2013.
Fanning, B. (2020, February 26). Wharton research reveals the ultimate 5-minute strategy for boosting your productivity. Inc
Fowler, J., & Rodd, E. (2013, May 10). The art of the five-minute favor. Big Think.
Grant, A. (2013). Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success. New York: Viking.
Podsakoff, N.P., Whiting, S.W., Podsakoff, P.M., & Blume, B.D. (2009). Individual- and organizational-level consequences of organizational citizenship behaviors: A meta-analysis. Journal of Applied Psychology, 94, 122-141.
Schnabel, D. Adam Grant: Be a Giver Not a Taker to Succeed at Work. Forbes. 9. April 2013.
Image courtesy of asenat29 / CC BY-SA 2.0
About the author
Probably 50-50.
Money and influence in the first place give you an advantage, but I doubt a**holes stay at the top for a long time in public companies (perhaps in own companies as we have seen).
Nice guys sleep better – except: Psychopaths (low emotional score, high risk score) are off the template.
Doubt this makes us wiser.
Merry Xmas Mark
I agree. It’s hard for takers to stay on top. And if you somehow do stay there (perhaps because you own the company), it will be harder to attract and retain the best people.
One of the advantages that givers have is their large network of people willing to help. Takers may also have a large network–of people waiting for them to fall!
Happy holidays to you, too.